For many women with vaginismus, the idea of a Pap test can feel overwhelming. The fear isn’t just about the procedure itself, but about losing control, being surprised, or experiencing pain. Over the years I’ve seen countless women who postponed their cervical screening because of this fear — and wh...
“I Feel Like Half a Woman” — Vaginismus and Self-Worth
One of the most painful thoughts many women with vaginismus share with me is: “I feel like I’m only half a woman.”
If you’ve ever had this thought, please know you are not alone. When intimacy feels impossible, when fear or pain block you from...
How to Get Past the First Insertion of a Dilator (or Finger) with Vaginismus
For many women living with vaginismus, the idea of inserting even the smallest dilator, or even a finger, can feel terrifying. You might have bought a set of dilators, unwrapped them, and then thought: I can’t do this. It ...
Why Is Sex Important? Can’t a Relationship Be Just Platonic?
When living with vaginismus, many women ask themselves a difficult question: “Why is sex even important? Why can’t it be normal to have a platonic relationship?”
It’s a brave and honest question. If sex feels painful, frightening, or imp...
It’s one of the most emotionally raw, physically frustrating, and often invisible experiences a woman can face: you want to be close, but your body won’t let you. Not out of choice — but because the second anything comes near your vulva or vaginal entrance, your muscles clamp down. Your heart races....
When the Path to Healing Feels Too Hard: How to Stay on Track When You Want to Give Up
Have you ever had one of those days when you’ve been trying your best — eating better, moving more, committing to your healing — and suddenly the scale goes up instead of down?
Or maybe you’ve been doing your da...