I have never been able to have sex, I was only very, very rarely able to insert a tampon with enormous expenditure of time and pain when pulling it out. The insertion of a finger was also more difficult than right ...
My ex-boyfriend and I had pushed the topic aside after sex did not work out after many attempts and my attempts to insert the dilators at home alone did not bring the desired success. Unfortunately, he left me pretty much alone with the subject. After 11 years of relationship, he broke up. I then tried to tackle the problem alone and again practiced with the dilators at home. I also started psychotherapy. Unfortunately, there were only very small successes. During the dilator training, I unfortunately couldn't get past the second dilator (I practiced for at least an hour every day) and I also stopped psychotherapy in frustration after about a year. I joined a motivational group through a vaginismus forum. This group also included a woman who had already received therapy from Dr. Reeve and had nothing but good things to say. Without further ado, I decided to sign up for therapy.
The therapy is carried out within three appointments of 1.5 hours each. I could hardly imagine that the problem that had been with me for so long and simply seemed insoluble could be successfully treated in such a short time. Miss Dr. Reeve always explained the vaginismus reflex in great detail for about an hour, so that I finally understood what is going on down there due to the vaginismus. Then it went to dilator training for about 30 minutes. Knowing that someone was there who really knows the topic and can give lots of helpful tips for this situation relieved me of a lot of fear. On the first day I was able to insert the first two dilators in a short time. It also helped me a lot that we could see through the ultrasound whether I had already overcome the critical point.
On the second day I was able to insert the third dilator and on the third day the last dilator about halfway in.
The very next day at home I was able to fully insert the last dilator. It gets easier every time. The duration of the exercise has also been reduced enormously. I now practice about 40 minutes every day. On good days I can do my exercises with all dilators in 20 minutes.
Two weeks after therapy, I had sex with my new boyfriend for the first time. I still have to do the exercises right before that, but I'm optimistic that I can handle it.